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Post by aghast on Feb 15, 2016 15:15:39 GMT
Why does every man under the age of 30 have a Beard nowadays?
Why does everyone use oven chips even though they're rubbish?
What has happened to Paul McCartney's singing voice?
Why is it impossible to stop eating a family size bag of crisps?
Why is a Domino's pizza so much more expensive than one in a restaurant?
What are the ingredients of a kebab shop cheeseburger?
How is Justin Bieber so successful?
Why does the second week of a fortnight's holiday go so much faster than the first?
Who agreed that Spud-U-Like would be a good name?
Has the Queen ever had hanky panky with another man?
Who watches anything on Channel 5 except the footie highlights?
How do Sky get away with charging so much?
Answers or more questions please.
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Post by Hugo the Elder on Feb 15, 2016 16:38:13 GMT
Because people are fecking idiots is the answer to at least half those questions.
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stuart1974
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Post by stuart1974 on Feb 15, 2016 17:32:30 GMT
Why do people have so little patience these days?
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Post by Hugo the Elder on Feb 15, 2016 18:49:29 GMT
Why do people have so little patience these days? , I've answered that one.  |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 15, 2016 19:42:52 GMT
I'll have a go at this.........
Why does every man under the age of 30 have a Beard nowadays? - They don't.
Why does everyone use oven chips even though they're rubbish? - Because 'proper' chips means peeling spuds, cutting them up, then using a deep fat fryer which stinks the house out. You also have potato peelings which stink the bin out.
What has happened to Paul McCartney's singing voice? - He never had one.
Why is it impossible to stop eating a family size bag of crisps? - It's only impossible if you are already a fat knacker.
Why is a Domino's pizza so much more expensive than one in a restaurant? - It's for gullible people to maintain the high profit margin.
What are the ingredients of a kebab shop cheeseburger? - Save yourself. Don't eat it.
How is Justin Bieber so successful? - Marketing.
Why does the second week of a fortnight's holiday go so much faster than the first? - It doesn't.
Who agreed that Spud-U-Like would be a good name? - Well I didn't.
Has the Queen ever had hanky panky with another man? - Wash your mouth out. Of course not. Prince Phillip on the other hand.......well, not with a bloke, but you get my drift.
Who watches anything on Channel 5 except the footie highlights? - What is Channel 5?
How do Sky get away with charging so much? - They can only charge what people are prepared to pay.
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stuart1974
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Post by stuart1974 on Feb 15, 2016 19:53:44 GMT
Why do people have so little patience these days? , I've answered that one. About time too! |
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Post by Hugo the Elder on Feb 15, 2016 20:01:00 GMT
See?
Nobby proves my point.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 15, 2016 20:22:30 GMT
See? Nobby proves my point. but I'm a likable idiot. |
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Post by inee on Feb 15, 2016 20:34:06 GMT
Why does every man under the age of 30 have a Beard nowadays? Probably because they have cotton wool chops rather than mutton chops and their mummies wont allow them a sharp razor Why does everyone use oven chips even though they're rubbish? Not in my house has to be proper fried spuds, oven chips invented by skinny twats What has happened to Paul McCartney's singing voice? he's not the real one probably all those years of veggie sh**e food from his first mrs. or he asked heather to sit on his face without thinking and her pegleg got stuck in his throat Why is it impossible to stop eating a family size bag of crisps? Because if you don't eat the who bag you is a gert girly wimp Why is a Domino's pizza so much more expensive than one in a restaurant? Because people are too Dam lazy to cook for themselves What are the ingredients of a kebab shop cheeseburger? Like any thing with melted cheese, its made from the discombobulated torn testicle of a maggot filled dead dogs co,ck with a scrapping of virginal throat gonorrhea(you though it was artichokes(well she did), delicately drizzled with a syphilitic female donkeys love juice, then glazed with authentic arabic camel toe, whilst delicately smoked over a pyre of dead bodies with the blowback of 60 lambert and butlers to add a smokiness How is Justin Bieber so successful? because all his fans are devoid of either maturity, intelligence or both ,either that or they had a diy lobotomy from the internetWhy does the second week of a fortnight's holiday go so much faster than the first? Because the so called god is a lady garden, just another of the catholic jokes to world domination Who agreed that Spud-U-Like would be a good name? Some one who facied a spud Has the Queen ever had hanky panky with another man? Yes in fact peter and the test tube babies wrote a song about it called the queen gives good blowjobs Who watches anything on Channel 5 except the footie highlights? Me new series of the x-files onHow do Sky get away with charging so much? Probably as an insurance for murdochs new marriage Answers or more questions please. Answers in Bold |
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Post by inee on Feb 15, 2016 20:36:57 GMT
Why do people have so little patience these days? , Might have something to do with it being illegal to operate on people in our front rooms these days |
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Post by Hugo the Elder on Feb 15, 2016 21:27:08 GMT
Will Nobby's wife ever cook an edible meal?
Actually, I think I may be able to answer that one myself.
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Post by baggins on Feb 16, 2016 12:05:45 GMT
Why am I still ill? 3 days! 3 fricking days and I'm still passing bubble poo. Not well. Shivvering one minute, sweating the next, coughing, puking, reckon I'm going through the change.
In a really bad mood. Bollox.
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Post by Hugo the Elder on Feb 16, 2016 13:11:16 GMT
How many people just experienced schadenfruede?
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Post by baggins on Feb 16, 2016 13:20:38 GMT
How many people just experienced schadenfruede? About as many as understand what that is. Some sort of sausage right? |
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Post by Hugo the Elder on Feb 16, 2016 13:23:37 GMT
How many people just experienced schadenfruede? About as many as understand what that is. Some sort of sausage right? That depends on how much pleasure you get from someone else's uncomfortable sausage. From the search history on that laptop Henbury fixed for you, I'd say a little too much. |
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Post by baggins on Feb 16, 2016 13:44:04 GMT
About as many as understand what that is. Some sort of sausage right? That depends on how much pleasure you get from someone else's uncomfortable sausage. From the search history on that laptop Henbury fixed for you, I'd say a little too much. An uncomfortable sausage? Only when I fly, those seats really aren't good. Bloody Henbury, confidential on Consortium, not on laptop work. Git. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 16, 2016 13:55:12 GMT
That depends on how much pleasure you get from someone else's uncomfortable sausage. From the search history on that laptop Henbury fixed for you, I'd say a little too much. An uncomfortable sausage? Only when I fly, those seats really aren't good. Bloody Henbury, confidential on Consortium, not on laptop work. Git. Tsk, you and your sausages eh. |
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Post by baggins on Feb 16, 2016 13:57:27 GMT
An uncomfortable sausage? Only when I fly, those seats really aren't good. Bloody Henbury, confidential on Consortium, not on laptop work. Git. Tsk, you and your sausages eh. You really want to talk sausage? |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 16, 2016 13:59:49 GMT
Tsk, you and your sausages eh. You really want to talk sausage? Not really, as I live in the land of the sausage eaters. Do you know, I once had a sausage that was half a meter in length. It had to be folded over to fit in a gert big baguette. That was in Berlin. |
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Post by baggins on Feb 16, 2016 14:33:42 GMT
You really want to talk sausage? Not really, as I live in the land of the sausage eaters. Do you know, I once had a sausage that was half a meter in length. It had to be folded over to fit in a gert big baguette. That was in Berlin. Yea, right, baguette.
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