Best football food (other posts getting a bit shouty)

I'll never forget Oldham away a few years ago, got the unofficial coach up with nothing but eight cans of Thatchers for sustenance. By midday me and my mate are feeling a bit peckish but the 'smart' motorway is playing havoc with the drivers plans and we're falling behind schedule, for some reason this means we make a stop off at an amateur FC somewhere in Chesire, it's not a matchday so the sausage and chips on the board isn't on the menu, just a bag of KP Nuts and real ale it is then.

We arrive at Boundary Park and everybody heads for the away end, except me and my pal who've spotted a pub a few streets away and are surely in for some delightful Northern fayre. But of course we aren't just more really cheap ale, a few rollies and maybe a bag of crisps. Onwards to the ground just in time for kick off, they've ran out of pies but there'll be more at halftime - excellent, let's watch the game and out-sing and outplay these northern b*st*rds. And well, things begin to get a little be delirious from this point but I think we did out-sing them, and beat them, but possibly not outplay them. Down 5 minutes before half time, queues already huge, suns beating and smokers are sneakily smoking. It echo down the line, they're out of food, they're out of food. Two more beers and two packets of crisps then, a craft rollie through the fence and an angry steward - I feel like we scored 3 goals, vintage Darryl era before it all went a bit potty.

Full time and happy days, unhappy bellys, brains not too handy either - drink a water but need something to soak up all that liquid. Back on the coach, waining, concisousness abating, stomach gurgling. We stop, at a petrol station - maybe it was Shell. 'Dam hell mate finally, what do you want', 'any f*cking sandwich mate, anything like that'. Five minutes later my muckers back on the bus and hands me a beef, horseradish and red onion sandwich. I don't know the brand, nothing fancy, if I ate it now I'd probably hate it. But in that moment, the crisp tang of the onions, salty thinly sliced beef and harsh burn of a lashing of horseradish - well, I really can't describe how much I enjoyed and needed that sandwich.